Menopause is defined as the time beyond which our periods have ended. It happens because our egg supply diminishes, meaning that we produce less and less of the hormone oestrogen.
Oestrogen has a protective effect. It helps regulate temperature and sleep and also has a part to play in memory and bone strength. Of course, it is also a major player in fertility, alongside progesterone and testosterone. Decline of progesterone levels happens in the years before menopause - in perimenopause - and this loss causes symptoms such as loss of libido and motivation.
When we are in our fertile years, between puberty and menopause, our brains are awash with oestrogen. It helps us adapt to motherhood, regulates our periods, and promotes brain health, amongst other actions.
So as oestrogen levels drop as we enter perimenopause, our brain has to learn to manage without it.
What are the symptoms that women struggle with?
Firstly, not everyone struggles with menopause. Around 20% of women will sail through and hardly notice it happened. 60% will experience mild to moderate symptoms. Only the remaining 20% will experience symptoms severe enough to impact their daily lives.
Here are the top 4 symptoms …
Hot flushes
One of the most common symptoms is hot flushes (or flashes). These immense surges of heat occur because oestrogen normally regulates temperature. In its absence, the range of temperature that is manageable for us becomes much smaller. Women in menopause often experience being too cold as well as too hot.
On their own, hot flushes may not be too much of a concern. They become problematic when women experience them at inconvenient or inappropriate moments. So, for example it may be fine to have a hot flush whilst you’re chatting with a good friend at home. Not so great if you’re presenting an important idea at a work meeting.
Poor sleep
Women in menopause and perimenopause often report poor sleep. They may fall asleep easily and then wake in the night and be unable to fall asleep again.
Sometimes the problem is temperature regulation. During menopause, we experience night sweats and hot flushes which keep us awake. Sometimes it may even mean changing the sheets.
Lack of sleep leads to a myriad of other symptoms, not least of which is -
Brain fog
Brain fog includes the feeling that it’s impossible to make decisions, find words, remember names. It’s frustrating, embarrassing and can be frightening. It can lead to a loss of confidence in even the most confident and competent women.
As a hypnotherapist, one of the main reasons women come to see me in perimenopause and menopause is because of a loss of confidence, caused by brain fog.
This loss of confidence shows up in all sorts of ways; in relationships, at work, when driving. Even simple decisions become difficult when brain fog gets in the way. We can wonder if we are losing our minds.
Depression
Hot flushes leading to poor sleep and brain fog with a resultant loss of confidence, can create depression.
The reality is, that these symptoms and our menopause often run alongside other major life events.
At this time in our lives, there are social pressures that come from ageing, ageing parents, children leaving home, illness, bereavement and a host of others. It’s hardly surprising that we feel an impact on our mental health.
So, what can we do about it all?!
Firstly, check in with your GP. Symptoms of menopause are similar to those of other conditions, so get checked and know what you’re dealing with. You may want to discuss HRT (hormone replacement therapy) which can be extremely effective in managing symptoms. Not everyone wants HRT though, and some women are excluded from taking it for various health reasons. If you’re not ready or able to go down that route, here are some effective strategies to help.
Stay healthy. Find some exercise that you enjoy - do it with friends. Exercise is one of the most effective ways to manage the symptoms of menopause, and of course it has fantastic side effects! Low impact and strength-based activities such as walking, and Pilates are currently thought to be most beneficial for midlife women. When you exercise with friends, or join a new group, you also reap the rewards of support and connection.
Eat healthily and investigate the foods which are especially beneficial for women in menopause. I can recommend Emma Skilton and Margaret Bell as nutritional experts for women in midlife. You may also want to look at the Blue Zones website, where you’ll discover how communities around the world stay healthy for longer.
Discover a new perspective. You may have to change the way you see things and see yourself. This is a new phase of life, one which you haven’t experienced before. What are the opportunities? It’s easy to see what’s going wrong. When you make a deliberate decision to choose to see what’s going right, you can change your life. Solution Focused therapy can help with this, by increasing your confidence and motivation.
Plan for change. Change is inevitable and as women we are fantastic at adapting. We have spent our lives with changing moods and phases brought about by our hormones, and in some ways, menopause is no different. What IS different is that in this stage of life we have a power and experience that can mean we can shape this new phase in unexpected and exciting ways. So instead of worrying that you will miss your children when they fly the nest, be ready with a new hobby or interest. Instead of mourning your ability to party until dawn, learn how to enjoy the sunrise from a hilltop or a beach.
Learn to relax. Real, deep relaxation is beneficial for both physical and mental health. When we relax deeply, we stimulate the part of our nervous system that regulates our digestion, blood pressure and heart rate. If you can also take yourself into a hypnotic state, you’ll experience a refresh of your mind which will clear the brain fog.
Take a nap. A strategic 20-minute nap is like magic! I’m known as ‘The Queen of the Power Nap’ and for good reason. If you nap for around 20 minutes and no longer, and your nap is complete by 4pm, it won’t affect your night-time sleep. In fact, you will probably discover that you sleep better at night.
Recognise your resources. It’s easy to feel that you have lost your confidence and sparkle when they get covered up by menopause symptoms. They are definitely still there. Sometimes we just need a little help to rediscover them. Doing some of the things mentioned above can help. If you need a bit more, ask for recommendations for a good therapist or coach.
Remember that menopause, like all other cycles of our lives, will pass. Talking, sharing, and educating yourself about the symptoms can make it feel less daunting.
At Aloft Hypnotherapy, founder Sally Potter has focused on supporting women to truly take control of their mental health and well-being and has created a specialist, holistic approach to help. Using a gentle mix of solution focused questioning, hypnosis, and a sprinkle of neuroscience, she guides clients to recognise their strengths, to create the future they want, free from fear, and full of confidence.
Solutions range from group relaxation classes and one-to-one hypnotherapy to residential retreats. To discover more, you can visit alofthypnotherapy.com, or linktr.ee/pottersaloft